my lists of food

i made Soo this dish last night.

but with only 3 weeks left, we still have a lot of food to eat.
See we bring all this stuff from America, and buy a lot from the import store and we save it... but now we're leaving for 8 months. Do we eat the local food we won't get for a while, or eat the food we alredy spent money on and often crave?

Here's what we still have to eat
1. Pepperoni pizza x3
2. Chicken parmesan
3. Tacos x2
4. Stuffed chicken
5. Cincinnati chilli
6. Chicken chilli
7. Lasagna
8. Buffalo chicken
9. Pulled pork
10. plenty of salad dressing
11. a lot of marinades

Plus one of the western restaurants just introduced a mexican wrap- which is just like a burrito: salsa, sour cream... and LOTS of meat! Yes, this is a big deal when you live in the middle of nowhere Asia!

Meanwhile, still craving American food. Where should we eat first?

things we want
1. Mediteranean food
2. jamba juice
3. Weber Grrill
4. In N Out & Father's Office
5. CPK... or any pizza delivered
6. fast food like McDonalds
7. sit down in a panera
8. Peruvian Food
9. KFC double down and biscuits
10. Angelo's deep fried french toast
11. Chipotle... mexican food
12. ice cream

Is it strange when we think of going to America we think of food all sorts of other countries?
3 weeks...

My family-friendly job

How do people do it?
How do married couples with 9-5 jobs make their marriage work?
How do pregnant couples survive?
How does a pregnant woman work?

i am so glad that my bosses are more concerned about my marriage and family than my production.

And i am so glad that i don't have a 9-5 office job that has an hour commute.

Pretty much everything i do and Soo does- is at home.
i take class at home, so my teacher comes here, i don't even have to leave for that.
We have some meetings elsewhere, but since we work together- we go to those meetings together.

i am rarely apart from Soo. So, if she gets sick, i can be there with her. IF she needs me to get something for her, i can get it. When she is throwing up, i am standing right next to her.

i don't know how others do it.

i would hate being away from Soo when she is feeling sick - which is every day.
i would hate for her to suffer alone.


Perhaps if her schedule wasn't so flexible, she would be busier, and not think about how sick she is. But i'm thankful for our flexability.
i am glad i have flexability, so if i need to take care of Soo in the middle of the afternoon, i can. And then later in the evening, i can do the work i need to do.

Sometimes i feel guilty for how much i am home, and how some balls got dropped.
But i would much rather invest in my marriage than in my ministry.
i believe Soo (and the baby) is God's #1 priority for me.

We are glad God called us to this field. When we have the baby, i will use all my vacation days and paternal leave- and basically have two months to just help take care of the baby.
i don't know how the rest of you do it. i'll send you my prayers... even with the time, we still need God. No way we do this without Him!

The thing about instruction

When I feel like I did something bad or failing at something. I don’t really want instruction or input on how to improve. I want affirmation, and to feel better about myself. Even if I really do need to improve, I’d rather live in ignorance & feel good about myself.
This is foolishness.

I was reading a review on Shepherding a Child’s heart. One person wrote- The book made me feel bad about myself and how I parent. I already feel bad, I don’t need this book telling me that.
(I also watched an episode of Everybody loves Raymond, where he goes on tv. At first they are all so happy for him. But when he goes back,t hey give him some constructive criticism. The show makes fun of him for being angry they were so nice to him at first, but shows he’d rather have that, than the feedback).

Another reviewer, was pretty humble and said I didn’t realize how much I was doing wrong. This book was very helpful.

When I mess up with my wife. I apologize and want her to forgive me and tell me I’m not a bad person.
Really, I should want her to tell me how I messed up, but she loves me anyway. She doesn’t hold it against me, she forgives me. She believes I am a good man.

I hate the learning style here. IF you mispronounce the word, your teacher will scold you and tell you “you’re wrong, you’re wrong!” They will publically shame you sometimes.
In America we affirm people. Some teachers never correct. I still remember AP English, Senior year of Highschool. IT was obvious people hadn’t read the book. As they’re asked questions, they just start making things up. The teacher has this puzzled look and can only say “That’s an interesting perspective, I’ve never thought of it that way (or heard that before).”
I do like Positive Reinforcement. I think we should use it. But I think we go too far.

It seems we vale feeling good about ourselves, more than being good.

Our American longing

4 weeks til America. Time is going by slowly and quickly at the same time. Quickly b/c there are a lot of things we want/need to do before we go... slowly b/c we can't wait to get there.

i will write some blogs about the joys and adventures of living in Asia, but for now, let me talk about America...

A few weeks ago i asked Soo what she would do if we had one day in America
She said she would go to the Grand Lux, the jamba juice... starbucks for a QT, go shopping, Chipotle... Peruvian food, and maybe a movie...
She included 3 big meals + breakfast and another drink... i think she may have als mentioned dessert at crumbs or at the farmer's market.

She didn't talk about seeing her family or visiting friends...

Usually, when i think of going home it is all about friends... but i can understand her sentiment. The longer i live in Asia the more i miss American culture and food.
We are getting more settled in this place too. Things have normalized. But maybe the fascination of it has worn off too.

When i went home last fall for Ken's wedding, it was the first time i had been in the states in the fall in 5 years! i was actually more excited about watching football than Ken's wedding!

We can watch a lot of tv shows here, especially as the internet speeds get faster and the additions of hulu and youtube, but we still can't watch sports. i have a bunch of old tv shows on dvd ( 8/9 seasons of seinfeld, 1st 6 of scrubs, all of simpsons and friends and Arrested Development, 1st 4 of that 70's show, 1st 3 of Cosby & wings, 1st 2 of King of queens & Mad about you, 1st 3 of entourage & Lost) So we're doing well, but i miss syndication...

i can cook a lil bit now and make food more and more often(using Asian grammar). There are more western restaurants... but i still miss going out, and i still miss the variety of food.

So, when we think of America, we do think of friends- how much easier it will e to call them, and how much easier it will be to see them. We're living a couple miles away from some of our good friends. We'll be living a 1/2 hr west of one of my best friends and a 1/2 hour north of another, and about an hour from abunch of them. So, i can't wait!

But so much more we're looking forward to.

We're going back to the states to have a baby, but i think we more often think about living in the US.

(in no particular order)
1. weekly tv shows with friends
2. weekly Bible study
3. church- seeing people, worshipping, good message
4. meeting new people at church or thru other friends
5. hopefully a weekly lunch with Mark... and maybe also with marc
6. trips to Indy to see friends 2/mo
7. watching whatever is on tv
8. college football
9. college basketball-esp my Boilermakers!
10. listening to music on te radio... in the car
11. Barnes & Noble or Borders... reading books
12. At Panera having a QT
13. ordering a pizza
14. fast internet connections
15. playing basketball

Soo has been craving BBQ lately... so some baby back ribs sound great!
Mediteranean food sounds good... mm cold skim milk! oh yeah! DQ... sweet breakfast foods... cold mike's hard lemonade (i've only drank this like 3 times in my life, but i crave it)... speaking of craving: white castle...freckled lemonades and all you can eat fries from Red Robin...In N out... fast food of any sort... a hot pizza for CPK...

Oh, we miss America!

the thing about forgiving sin

What should we do when someone sins?
Americans feel Christians are extremely judgmental. Yet, many other cultures feel Christians are sacrilegious.
How are we to respond to sin? How are we to act?

Most of us are primarily concerned about what others may think of us, rather than dealing with the actual sin. We’re more worried about how we may be perceived than what will help the person. We’re more worried about doing everything right to feel good about ourselves, rather than doing right to honor God.

We have replaced being loving with being nice.

Sin needs to be confronted with the Gospel.
Jesus came to seek and save the lost. Jesus came that sin may be forgiven.

But we do a horrible job forgiving sin.

We rationalize sin, understand sin, diminish sin, ignore sin, marginalize sin, accept sin. But do we really help people understand they are forgiven.

Most people aren’t looking for forgiveness. To be forgiven of sin, they need to understand they in fact did sin. They want us to say what they did was ok, it was understandable, it was acceptable. They are seeking understanding , acceptance.

But what people want and need truly is: Forgiveness.


The other day one of my friends became very angry with our bus driver. There was not enough space in the car for everyone. We tried to make it work, but it was a safety hazard and a traffic violation. He wouldn’t take us. My friend got very angry.

He realized soon he was very bitter and resentful and treated the driver in an unloving way. He said things that were rude, accusatory and insulting. What he did was wrong.

My lovely wife, perhaps the most gracious person I know, wants him to know it is ok. She tells him, “he was very rude. He could have treated you better.”

While this is a true statement, is that what we need to tell someone when they sin?
In our attempts to be gracious and help people feel better, we justify their sin.
Then they leave like they didn’t really do anything wrong. Any person could have done it. IT was a mistake. I don’t need to worry about it or think about it anymore. In fact, that other person was wrong, and it is their fault I reacted the way I did.


Does he leave the situation understanding the Gospel? Does he receive forgiveness?

How should we respond when a person sin?

I am no expert in this. When someone sins around me, I like to look the other way. I may try to change the subject per say- get us thinking about something else. Or I just sit there stunned, not sure what to do to avoid the awkwardness.

I don’t like awkwardness. I hate tension. I like when things are easy. I like when things are cordial.
These are my idols.
Cordial isn’t love. It is not God’s standard.

And I think the right thing may not be received well. Some may eat it up and fall in love with the Gospel, but don’t be surprised if many get angry at first.

1. Call sin sin. Sin needs to be acknowledged. IF there is no sin, there is nothing to forgive. There is no need for the Gospel

2. We can empathize, and even say how we may even feel the same way or do the same thing. Let them know we understand their situation and/or their feelings. “That was tough” “I can understand why you would feel that way”

this is not a step by step process, either 1 or 2 could be done first

3. Point to a better way. Point to what God calls us to: love, purity, kindness, giving, sacrifice, holiness, etc. Show how Jesus lived this out, and point out that the Holy Spirit wants to change them

4. Give the Gospel. The Gospel is not simply for a non-Christian to hear so they can accept Christ. Non-Christians and Christians alike need to hear the Gospel every day!
a. God hates the sin, and Jesus died for it
b. Christ has bore the penalty and the shame of that sin
(Romans 8:1 is a personal favorite: There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus)

5. Forgive them and let them know you love them, think highly of them, forgive them and are confident that (if they have accepted Christ) God is at work in them to make them more like Christ.
(God will never leave us or forsake us.;
He who began a good work in you, will complete it, etc)


We want to communicate kindness & love.
We want to give grace & offer forgiveness.
We need to confront the sin, and apply the Gospel to our sin, so we may rest in the love & kindness of God, rely on the Holy Spirit and rejoice in Christ.

the one after the retreat

The Retreat this weekend went well... but this isn't going to be an update, this is to let you into the world of Asian retreats

Retreats in Asia mean...
... going to the bathrooom means going to an outhouse where the pig lives
... not pooping for 50 hours
... sleeping on board on top of concrete
... having your message translated... and not sure if it is translaed correctly... and having to wait for reactions...
... going to bed at 11 and waking up at 7 (instead of going to bed at 4 and waking up at 8 like i would in the states)
... rain (or in this weekend's case: hail - but only for a few minutes)
... getting a discount at the restaurant by taking a picture with the owners
... sitting next to heat fans
... having to come up with new illustrations b/c the American ones don't work
... a back pack worth of stuff never used: Yes, i never changed below my waist- not even when i slept: i didn't change my socks, underwear or jeans all weekend... didn't shower, so didn't use the towel... only changed my shirt once... so the extra shirts weren't needed either...

i miss retreats in America... and it is different being older, married, a kid on the way... but i still had fun

My writing dreams

This week at our team dinner we had a "child" theme.
We talked about what we wanted to be when we were kids

When i was a kid i wanted to be a stuntman and never use handles on car doors - like The Dukes of Hazzard.
Later, i wanted to be a professional athlete- but soon realized that would never happen, and dreamed of being an owner or general manager... and when i realized that wouldn't happen i wanted to be a sports writer.

i did wind up with a degree in writing - but it was from Purdue...

Now i play fantasy sports- and play quite well. It is like being a GM. And sometimes i write about sports on my blogs (but have not reached the status of my friends who created boiledsports.com).

A few years ago we used to do surveys - and i'd ask people what 3 things do they want to do in life. Mine:
1. Get married
2. Have a family
3. write a book

Blogging has helped
i wrote a lot on my previous blog http://lilmookie.xanga.com/
And even wrote a bunch of devotionals http://mookieslildevo.xanga.com/ - the goal was 365, but not quite there.

i think i'm going to try writing more, maybe even start on some of books

Ideas for books
1. Everything i needed to know i could have learned in Sunday School
2. One Messed-up Missionary
3. mookie's lil devo
4. Devos from Deuteronomy
5. Jesus pooped


But how do people get their start?
How do people get big?

i'm not gonna quit my day(& night) job, but i want to pursue this a bit- i enjoy it